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My Cup of Tea: Falling and Feeling in Love

What does falling in love means to me?

A lot of questions have been asked to me about love, but I will always shy myself away from answering such vulgarity. For the first time ever, let me talk about love - one that is different from love of family and friends. One that is about the affection, admiration, care and even lust one feels for another person.

Why do I always refrain from answering anything about love? I do answer sometimes, but it will always be so brief that the asker will not have a chance to ask the second time around. At this age and time, people expect me to get married already. But I am different. For me, marriage is not just about someone knocking on the door and asking for my hand immediately. Because I believe that I have to have an affection for the person that I am going to call my husband for the rest of my life.

It is not that I forbade love after nikah. In fact, I feel really happy for friends whose marriages are arranged yet manage to fall in love with their husbands after the wedding.

Affection is the very core ticket to marriage and love for me. If I don't feel any liking to a person, I doubt about the rest of the time I will be spending with him.

Falling in love. Ah, lucky are those that love the person who loves them! I've always dreamt of that one true love. Who hadn't? I have spent every waking hour of highschool fantasizing about the kind of love I will be experiencing.

I found the kind of love that I want. I did. But nobody told me that it can be this hard to fall in love. It is indeed true that falling in love is a disease. And the only cure is to get married right after falling in love. I am not even joking.

Right now, it is a hurdle to fall in love. But soon enough, to love is as light as feather, especially when both of you are feeling just the same and want the best for each other in this dunya and akhirah. I am keeping my hopes high for this love. I am keeping my prayers to have just the same growing love forever.

Please keep my heart in your duas. It needs a lot of prayers, especially now that it has reached an extra mile in this life - falling and feeling in love.

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